It’s the Cognitive Dissonance Blogger Hour with Special Guest: Curtis Coleman

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Multiple media outlets (and Coleman’s own facebook page) are reporting tonight that Republican contender for Governor (of the actual State), Curtis Coleman has come up with a measured and even-handed response to Judge Piazza’s ruling on the Constitutionality of Amendment 83 (that’s gay marriage one).

Hahaha. I’m just kiddin’.

Curtis Coleman’s response to Judge Piazza’s ruling:

Coleman has decided that to keep the gays out of his marriage arena, he would propose an amendment to the Arkansas Constitution which would give the legislature power to invalidate any Arkansas state judge’s ruling with a 75% super-majority.

Not sure how he thinks that’s a good idea, because he didn’t bother to expand on that plan, but I’m listening, if he wants to respond to my email. I would really, really love to hear more details about this.

Because at this point, why not just make crazy suggestions undermining our entire system of government?

At the risk of a permanent migraine, let’s take a closer look at Curtis Coleman.

Not because he will ever be Governor, but because we need this documented in case he tries to run for anything ever again. After all, he’s already tried (unsuccessfully) to run for Senate.

Get ready.

Dis gon b gud

I have to say, I like his website layout. Typical boring color scheme, but it at least looks professionally designed. That’s my last compliment. It’s the best I could do.

Curtis Coleman on Marriage:

“God instituted and defined marriage as between a man and a woman before He instituted government.  Government has no authority to re-define an institution that pre-dated it.” – Curtis Coleman

Okay, first, I think we’ve got a pretty good idea about how he feels about separation of church and state (not to mention the separation of powers…). Even assuming a religious definition of marriage controlled a state definition, Romans 13:1-2 is one of several passages that refers to the importance of following government:  “Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.”

Second, God defined marriage where exactly? In the Bible? Ok, let’s look at that:

Third, Coleman, a former Baptist preacher scandalized his congregation when he divorced his first wife in 1999, after an (alleged) affair with a much younger woman.

How now brown cow?

But don’t worry, he says he’s the only person who hates divorce as much as God does. So there’s that.

Coleman on taxes:

When asked in an interview how he justified changes that would raise taxes on the poorest Arkansans, Coleman said, “If they do, I’ve missed that.” After being shown that his plan would raise taxes on some people by nearly 150 percent in the first year, Coleman said. “I would expect we would repair and change (that) before we did the actual proposal. It was certainly an unintended consequence and an oversight on my part, definitely not an intention to increase anybody’s taxes.”

He doesn’t know how his own tax plan impacts the poorest people in the state. That he wants to be Governor of.  Let that just sink in for a moment.

Curtis Coleman on Stem Cell Research:

He thinks it’s basically the same thing as a Nazi experiment.

But DONT WORRY! HE’S GOT HIS VERY OWN INSTITUTE ON CONSTITUTIONAL POLICY. I wish I were joking. But I am not.

Profound, isn’t it?

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